Selfish post, I'm warning you.

Don't tell me I didn't warn you.

I've felt extremely empty these days, and it's really queer. It's like everyone around me has their feelings; happiness, sadness, anger, love, jealousy, impatience, etc. I have feelings too, and yes, they're real too. Is it weird that in addition, I feel useless and weak, and only in this world to be there?
"Oh, yeah, she's there." That's what I would say if I were another person. I love that my friends are supporting, caring, and a touch on the crazy side on regular occasions. Of course, helping people is just another part of life. Whenever there's a problem, I do my best to help them fix it if they would like it. It gives me a sense of joy to know when something good happens for them. I'm never going to be tired of helping anyone.
However, it doesn't stop me from feeling so hollow. Is this all there is to me? People care about me, but in the end, do I really matter? Of course I matter. Stupid question... What am I doubting? Why am I complaining?
No matter what happens to me, whenever I have trouble, no one can truly help me in the end. I always have to figure it out, or do something by myself. Study for the PSAT? MAO? My abominable class rank? Health issue? Stupid issues, really, and what am I going to do about it? Complain to myself that I'm simply not content. The last time I was truly happy was so long ago that I don't know remember to identify it. There isn't a path to absolute satisfaction because I don't know what would make me better. All I can feel is emptiness and sadness.

And I know why.

Que lastima!

Yesterday, realization hit me. I know how to read a lot more of my third language than I do my first. This is because I changed the language setting of my iPod for the fun of it. Browsing through Chinese, Japanese, Italian, Portuguese, French, and Engilsh, I switched to Chinese and Spanish. Chinese was horrible. Spanish was a lot better. It was so sad. On the bright side, I'm quite sure I can speak and understand more Chinese, so it does balance in the end.
Earlier that day, I also noticed that the day I finished my last FLVS class was one of the happiest days of my life, no joke. For anyone out there who has felt the pain, you know what I'm talking about. The horror of boredom and the fact that you have to do more FLVS homework is a downhill path. You would think having something to do is better than nothing at all, but it only makes you more bored. Every step of the way, you trod into another pit of insanity and you can't back out because your class has been active for over 28 days. You're legally obligated to complete the course or receive an F. No amount of complaining will make things better until you stop procrastinating and do the assignments on the enormous master list.

HEMNES

Sorry, Linda! The MALM bed frame was really low- so low that it was a few inches of elevation for just a mattress and no box. Ryan's won, and yes, I'm going to have more trouble cleaning it. Hah. Like I've ever cleaned a bed frame. Well, that's because I've always just had the metal thing to hold it up with a wheel on each corner.
I suppose everyone is having a fabulous New Year and that most of the Asians are at Asian dinner parties. New Years over here is quiet, as it was last year when my parents went to bed at about 9:30pm or 10:30pm or something outrageously early like that.
I took 300 pictures, not including the ones that I deleted. It's probably time to upload a few.

3. Mission: SPACE
Choose from two exciting adventures on this mission to Mars. Join the Orange Team to experience intense training on the original voyage. Or join the Green Team for a milder journey with everything but the spinning. Minimum height 44/112 cm. Expectant mothers should not ride.

No life.

I practiced the piano this morning. And a Merry Christmas to you, too.
I also put another layer of paint stain onto the plaque, and my mom wants us to pack for the day after tomorrow, which makes no sense because today is sort of a holiday.
I'm wondering what would happen if I try to charge my iPod with a computer that doesn't have iTunes. Meaning, I hope it doesn't start to try to synchronize with nothing. But if the computer doesn't make it do anything, the theoretically it shouldn't happen, but I'm still not completely certain about it. Maybe I'm over analyzing it. ::EDIT:: I just checked, and I can. ::END EDIT::
Practice practice practice practice practice practice practice practice ... Tomorrow is the weekly lesson because we're leaving after that.
Feliz Navidad a ti, tambien.

Write as much as possible.

I always get kicked off the computer to do things today, and I haven't really done taht much. This morning, I "studied" for the PSAT as I was supposed to do after I had breakfast. Then, I practiced the day's worth of a piano concerto. Or maybe that's when I "studied." Lunch came around, and I had bread with duck. My parents got an address plaque that I had to measure, drill, and sand. Then, my dad gave me some sort of stain so I could stain it. Tomorrow, I have to paint it white and screw the numbers onto it. I'm not going to tell you which numbers because it would be kind of dangerous to say that online. The whole job reminded me of Applied Technology, which we had in middle school in 7th and 8th grade. We had to build things and it was almost fun. The one in 8th grade was the best because we built that trebuchet that my parents chucked away before we moved because they wouldn't let me keep it and my partner already had a trebuchet, albeit not as amazingly perfect.
Logan's current status is: ♫ Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger - Daft Punk, which definitely reminds me of drugs... don't say anything.
But they don't even apply anymore because now it's: ♫ Violin Sonata in G Minor, Op. 5 No. 5: I. Adagio - Convivium
Ironically, I don't listen to classical music unless I'm playing it or I'm sitting somewhere and someone else is playing it.
W00t! Linda got Blogspot.

Which one?

Linda likes the one on the left, and Ryan likes the one on the right. And Jack... wants both.
Between Linda and Ryan:
Linda: i like the rectangle one
Ryan: theyre all rectangles?
Linda: the one i like U_U
the other one is hard to clean
Ryan: cleaning? bah
Linda: bah?
you dont clean
SHE does
OHHHHH
Ryan: :'(
lololol
i laugh at your tears!
AHAHAHAHAHA
Ryan: maybe she is the wrong one
no cleaning!
Linda: yes cleaning!
Ryan: no cleaning!
no cleaning!
Linda: yes learning
ive made my point
1:55 PM
yes cleaning!
you dont appreciate easy to clean things U_U
Ryan: no i dont

Marxist

My statuses always begin with "Dear Karl Marx," and then I write something to him. That sounded weird.
We're leaving after Christmas for Orlando, where we will visit IKEA and Disney World. We'll be back on New Year's Eve.
Nothing has really happened recently, but yesterday, we went to Joseph's house. After that, we say "I am Legend." We = Chanyang, Katelyn, Jack, me, and Ketan didn't go to Joseph's house. Ryan and Lacey and Joseph and Chanyang's brother and June and Erin were at Joseph's house. We played SSBM, Halo, the piano, and ate pizza from Hungry Howie's and drank Coca-cola and Vault. Pictures are uploaded if you're bored enough to look at them.
Linda, dear, you're too nice to some people. Maybe that's what makes you so special my intern.
I should probably start the second semester of Physics, but my parents want me to study for the PSAT and MAO. Neither will be very successful, and on top of that, my floating vacation weeks will be used unless it really is a "holiday" for FLVS so that the schedules have been halted, too.
Two of my best friends are finally... ecstatic. :]

You should go biking.

My dad told me that, except when my parents say "should," it usually actually means "must." So, I did, and it was really cold because the wind was being mean and loud. I can't find my black sweater. :( Maybe it got lost at school.
It would be nice if I had transportation or money so I could get you a holiday present. Maybe I'll write cards.
...
I miss my sweater. :(
Well, there's a Bio and Stat test tomorrow. Fun fun fun! Seven more exams to go.
In only two years, we will be the ones who practically die of fear because we will be hoping to receive acceptance letters from some incredible universities. Ryan the GOP Fan might be waiting for Vanderbilt (where Al Gore graduated.. haha).
Yesterday, I listened to three podcasts in Spanish. Two were Spanish Intermediate, except it didn't really seem very intermediary because they were speaking quite slowly, and it wasn't very difficult to understand. Then, I listened to one that was Spanish Advanced, and they were actually speaking normally. However, I couldn't hear all of the words and it was definitely more challenging. Unfortunately, the transcripts require money.

-chomp chomp-

Eating a snack, recharging the iPod, talking to Ryan, and having read Joseph's blog post, I must say that I have absolutely no life. I'm too lazy to finish the post in which I wrote messages to people because it is one of those things you do a lot the first time and then you sort of drop it
My novel review for A Farewell to Arms had 1459 words in it, excluding the information on the corner of the page. Bs-ing the midterm for Physics, I have a solid A whether the teacher grades all the FRQs or not. If my additional seven exams weren't next week, I'd celebrate.
I feel like hanging out with someone. Anyone, I guess. Tell me if you're free. =]

Hahaha.

I got.. lower this year on the PSAT than last year. Because I messed up on the math section and cannot get perfect scores on it as Ryan seems to do each time he takes it. The Deerlake kids took it in 8th grade, too, so they've had it at least three times now. Four for Jack, since he took it a month or two ago.
Today in Stat, Tim showed me one of the prompts for the speaking portions of an AP Spanish test. It was about promoting the business at Niagara Falls, or something. I'm not sure, because I skimmed it before we had to leave for 4th period.
The Euro project is due tomorrow and I haven't finished my last drawing, so buena noche.