Tejal and Kejing's to-do list

1. Cornell Plantations. There is a giant bell?
2. go down to the gorges, wherever that is (1/2)
3. tunnel between Olin and Uris
4. Farmer's Market
5. go sailing if possible. Find out if possible.
6. state park
7. BoatYard Grill (1/2)
8. go on a date
9. see Denice Cassaro (1/2)
10. go sake bombing at Miyake
11. go up to the clocktower
12. Fuertes Observatory (1/2)
13. bomb a prelim
14. corn nuggets at The Nines
15. attend an opening at the Johnson Museum of Art
16. see something at the Schwartz Center (1/2)
17. go to the Law School Library, Reading Room
18. eat at Banfi's
19. trivia night
20. walk to the Commons and back
21. Cornell Cinema (1/2)
22. Holi on the arts quad

Big Break & Evangelism

Almost everyone seemed to be glad about this trip. Some mentioned spiritual and character growth, good Christ-centered conversations with people on the beach, and new fellowships with each other.
I completely agree. All of these comments are true and of course fail to truly describe the incredible experience.

But at the same time, my heart was concerned.
1. The passion to evangelize will die down because we are going back to real life, where our task in leaving our home is not only to speak to people about Jesus, but also to do countless other things. To worry about other things. To think that maybe glorifying God is not our first priority. To think that maybe God is not our first priority, even though He is real and eternal.
2. As the trip was ending, we started playing more games of Mafia. When I am not sleepy I think this is a fantastic game. At night, someone on the bus said, "Christians like this game more than the average person because it's the only time they're allowed to lie." Then I started thinking... how much blatant lying and deceit takes place over events that are real and important? How easily does the devil gather people to be like him? How many demons sit around before angels shoo them away, just because we didn't pray?

Don't let the devil chuckle at his success.
Feel uneasy when you meet someone who doesn't know that God loves them, but glad that God is working hard and battling for that person! Don't ever believe or admit that you aren't "good enough" to talk about God. Keep praying and reading the Bible to hone and grow your discernment. Jesus is always with you, helping you, guiding you... and He is not a secret. He is enormously important!

A Goal in Life

Conventionally, the media portrays the path to happiness as the American Dream, an ideal that touts wealth and material as the means to satisfaction. But since research has proven that happiness has no correlation with wealth in the absence of serious financial burden, this Dream is not the answer to finding happiness.
Similarly, our environment insists that love is a product of  romance. These experiences are often most possible among people who are not too wrinkly, and people who are not "stuck" with just one other person. But for example, we often hear that a stable marriage is the way to go. (I agree.) For the many years when two people are married, proportionately little of their time together would be "passionate," but an enormous amount of time would be "friendly." They are best friends. So maybe conventional wisdom and hopes are not accurate for our lives. They most certainly are not accurate for mine.

Revert to the year 2000, when the world was ostensibly simple. Ask me what I want to be when I grow up. I'd say, just to be happy.
I let this change. It was not a matter of questioning the semantics of happiness, or a sign that I'd settle with depression. Happiness was not my ultimate goal.
But love - for God, my family, friends, everyone - is unquestionably most important to me. Like happiness, it can grow in response to hardship, and can exist in countless forms. And with age, we get to explore their depth. Their similarities are numerous, and their differences reveal the importance of love. I will describe some of their most obvious similarities in order to introduce the reason for my ultimate goal.

More on love...
Despite the notions that true happiness and love cannot be found the mainstream way, many of us are always looking for better possessions and more passion.
But this is not enough. Our worldly ventures are not fulfilling, lasting, or permanent.
Love exists on any level of happiness. Love can be both joyful and painful, one-sided or mutual.
Jesus said that the most important of the commandments is to love God, and the next important was to love your neighbors (Matthew 23:37-40). He is the most fulfilling, lasting and permanent love, and one-sided because He always loves us more.

Another fun story from the Internet.

Me: God, can I ask You a question?
God: Sure
Me: Promise You won't get mad ... ... ... ...
God: I promise
Me: Why did You let so much stuff happen to me today?
God: What do u mean?
Me: Well, I woke up late
God: Yes
Me: My car took forever to start
 God: Okay
 Me: at lunch they made my sandwich wrong & I had to wait
 God: Huummm
 Me: On the way home, my phone went DEAD, just as I picked up a call
God: All right
 Me: And on top of it all off, when I got home ~I just want to soak my feet in my new foot massager & relax. BUT it wouldn't work!!! Nothing went right today! Why did You do that?
 God: Let me see, the death angel was at your bed this morning & I had to send one of My Angels to battle him for your life. I let you sleep through that
 Me (humbled): OH GOD
God: I didn't let your car start because there was a drunk driver on your route that would have hit you if you were on the road.
 Me: (ashamed) God: The first person who made your sandwich today was sick & I didn't want you to catch what they have, I knew you couldn't afford to miss work.
 Me (embarrassed):Okay
 God: Your phone went dead because the person that was calling was going to give false witness about what you said on that call, I didn't even let you talk to them so you would be covered.
 Me (softly): I see God
 God: Oh and that foot massager, it had a shortage that was going to throw out all of the power in your house tonight. I didn't think you wanted to be in the dark.
 Me: I'm Sorry God
 God: Don't be sorry, just learn to Trust Me.... in All things , the Good & the bad. Me: I will trust You.
 God: And don't doubt that My plan for your day is Always Better than your plan.
 Me: I won't God. And let me just tell you God, Thank You for Everything today. God: You're welcome child. It was just another day being your God and I Love looking after My Children...

Selfless.

Married or not… you should read this.
Marriage.
“When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her! With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now. The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again. In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage. This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door every morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request. I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully. My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office. On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her. On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore. She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart. That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband…. The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage! If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you. If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.
Source: somewhere on the Internet

Personal concerns answered by a personal God

Homosexuality is just one of many other sins, such as blasphemy, pride, lack of faith, adultery, envy...But, Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh but made alive in the spirit. (1 Peter 3:18)


This does not mean that we can say, "I can do anything since He will forgive me." For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." (Galatians 5:13-14)


No matter how indifferent we might act towards the God who sent down His son for us, He still loves, challenges, and pursues us. ...if from there you seek the LORD your God, you will find him if you look for him with all your heart and with all your soul. (Deuteronomy 4:29)

July 7, 2005

Today, I found something my brother wrote a bit over a month before he turned 6.
   [front] Kevin's wash list. I wash a Lego. I wash a Bionicle. I wash a flower. I wash a hot weele
   [back] I wash a Llnle [journal]. Kevin
Soon afterwards he learned how to spell "wish."
I am glad to know that these days, he is satisfied with what he already has.

Also... Recently I typed "twi" in the Chrome omnibar, in attempt to visit Twitter.com, only to press Enter as if on auto-pilot. This is how I found the "Twilight Addict Support Group (Twi Anon)" on Facebook.

Thank Goodness for Recycling

Today, I looked through a ton of high school papers and ended up with a heavy pile of recyclable material. Throughout college, I became further and further from materialistic. This is made easier since my room has always been rather empty. I have never really accumulated much. Still, I have little need for over 90% of the objects I own.
When I was small, I started a sticker collection, a coin collection, and a small eraser collection. I logged a couple hundred hours on some Pokémon games, including Crystal and Sapphire Version. My middle school friends went to some sort of anniversary event in Chicago and brought me back a special Celebi and Dragonite. After my little brother secretly overwrote the game to play on his own, I was so frustrated.
My jewelry was treasure: pearls, silver and gold.
When I received certificates, report cards and standardized test scores from school, I often saved them. If my name appeared on an orchestra or recital program, the program was worth keeping. If an object was of no significance to other people but affirmed my successes, I wanted to keep the paper in order to look back on it later, because it was worth the space.
What is a paper that says you did something well, or a particularly delicate necklace? What is a few pixels that mean something in a made-up world, or a perfect transcript? These things should be appreciated for all their value, whether accompanying a quiet nostalgic afternoon or encouraging further learning. They are a part of a lovely time and place of the past.
But it feels good to move on.

A Two Decades' Brief Checklist

Through preparation, experience and reflection, life is incredibly more multidimensional than these points can portray. But these goals lightly reflect my priorities and dreams for the future. They vary from absolutely important to barely of importance at all. Some are reminders for preservation rather than demands for growth or achievement.

1. Become more sure that Jesus died on the cross for us (and assurance of salvation)
2. Always be a role model for my brother
3. Take care of my parents whenever they need me
4. Pray for my family to know of God's love
5. Help teach school in the countryside of Susong
6. Be cheerful
7. Learn the Liszt's Hungarian Rhapsody, Rachmaninoff's Prelude Op. 23 No. 5, the rest of Chopin's Ballades
8. Buy a grand piano, a paper cutter, camcorder
9. and a Highlander for my father
10. Finish my movie
11. Write a lot of letters to people
12. Finish reading the Bible, The Pilgrim's Progress, all of C.S. Lewis's books, and much more
13. Spend a lot of time away from technology
14. Consistently count past 5 correctly
15. Sleep more than 8 hours a night
16. Hopefully get married. Hopefully have two children.
17. Find even more hipster music to enjoy
18. Go to a Killers concert
19. Understand the scope of my father's knowledge about physics and superconductors
20. Pray for my family and friends
21. Learn to cook from my mother... no recipes
22. Always put myself last
23. Keep writing in my journal
24. Become a civil engineer
25. Write a song
26. Do missions in East Asia
27. Learn more about disaster relief and mitigation
28. Love every person, with Jesus as my role model

What are you going to be for Halloween?

Peter: ugh studying preregistering not fun
Charles: i dont do halloweenzies
Emily: stuff
June: hm i think i will be a nazi zombie
Parker: I am unsure, but I have all the supplies to be a hobo (He bought a shopping cart at a thrift store for $3.50.)